Oct 28, 2020

Self-Care During Times of Transition

Nurturing your way to the life you want to lead

Transitions in life can be stressful. Understatement, right? Bear with me.

From jobs to living situations, partnerships to the passing of parents - the space between "before" and "after" can fill up with feelings of overwhelm fast, leading to self-limiting thoughts of doubt and insecurity. The tendency is to get swept up in rush, research, worry about money, and taking action after action.

What if I told you that the space between (cue Dave Matthews...sorry in advance) doesn't have to be debilitating? It's true! Ask Lao Tzu...

"Nature is never in a hurry, yet everything is accomplished." -Lao Tzu

The period of transition toward a new era in your life can actually be full of increased self-care, discovery, and understanding; All of which will guide you toward more calm and clarity, helping you to know and align with what you truly want to experience in life.

You might ask, "what's the catch?" Well, the "catch" is that it'll require potentially new habits of self-trust, dedication, and honesty, sprinkled with faith (this is not an article on religion here, keep going).

Ahead, I'll list 5 ways that you can nurture yourself during a transition and get more clear on what you want to manifest next for yourself.

1. Slooooow dowwwwwn.

When you slow down you give yourself a chance to connect with who you truly are right now - not who you were in your old position at work or in the role you played in your last relationship. The space between a transition usually means more time alone and with the opportunity of more stillness.

Your instinct may be to fight the façade of a "void" and fill it with other people and activities. Try to resist that habit and let yourself embrace the stillness. There are things you will learn there that you couldn't possibly know - about who you are and what you need - if you filled up this extra time with busying.

Get to know yourself better! What gets you pumped? What had you been saying you "don't have time for" before, that would've led to greater self-care?

Break out a pen and pad and start jotting down what you're really feeling right now. Be vulnerable! And don't judge yourself, for goodness sake.

Let the goal of this be to grow in being comfortable with you.

2. Refill your cup.

When survival mode kicks in, oddly enough, self-care is one of the first things to go out the window - even though that's actually what you need the most in those times.

Cook yourself a nourishing, unrushed meal and sit down (not in front of the TV) to enjoy every bite. Take a bath and let it be luxurious as can be; add candles, one of those fancy fizzy bath bombs, and maybe even a playlist that you create just for that experience. Take an uninterrupted walk in nature to reconnect, get a massage! Whatever you feels excited about as a form of ceremony to yourself.

When you prioritize recharging, you're able to show up more wholly (and from a higher vibration) for yourself and for others in your life.

3. Get clear on the lifestyle you want to embody.

When you're in the mode of allowing new things to come into your life (job, housemate, pet companion, etc), being honest with yourself about the lifestyle you want to live after it's been added is imperative.

You don't want to align with a puppy if you're not truly up for the demanding process of potty-training, right?!

Don't fool yourself into settling or taking on something that truly isn't for you and the life you want to live.

What are your non-negotiables? Write 'em down as they start flowing to the forefront of your mind so you can remind yourself every dang time you start to consider settling for less. And it'll happen. No shame in this game. Just prepare yourself and get in writing for your "future self" what your "now self" isn't afraid to confidently admit.

4. Surround yourself with a community of support.

Sure, self-care is key. The numero uno way to support yourself in times of transition. And let's not overlook the power of external support along the way.

Those closest to you should be your most dedicated cheerleaders. And I don't mean by way of telling you what you want to hear or always agreeing with you but in believing in you and your ability to deeply know what's best for you. Those that know your power and can remind you of it in times when you start to get all amnesia-y.

When life feels less stable, the last thing you need around you are nay-sayers and others directing undue pressure and harmful judgement at you.

If you feel you have more of the latter in this stage of your life, this is a wonderful opportunity to practice enforcing boundaries and stepping out of your comfort zone to surround yourself with new expressions of positive, empowering support.

5. Trust yourself.

At the core of your being is your intuition, nudges of wisdom and guidance being delivered in a quiet, subtle, steady stream. When you give yourself that above-mentioned space to be still, your intuition can be "heard" much more clearly.

The mind fears change and the unknown, which is simply its innate self defense go-to, but the intuition knows better. And self-trust is like a muscle with the capacity to be strengthened beyond your current capacity of imagination.

Over time, your intuition paired with trust in yourself will effortlessly lead you to the places that you really want to go, alongside the people that you really want to experience life with, within the spaces that are filled with support and sanctuary.

Cultivation of deepened self-trust will lead you to experience the life that you're most aligned with. And the higher you condition your vibration to be*, the higher the vibration of life's unfolding.

*All of the above-mentioned suggestions will indeed guide you to those vibrations.

So enjoy the space between, honor the stillness, and self-care your way to the life you really want to live.